Friday! But first, let's rehash Thursday

Yesterday I tried to make potato fries. I know it’s usual to assume all fries are made of potato but as it happens, everyone seems to be making everything into fry format lately so potato emphasis seemed necessary.

Anyway, the fry making process was exhausting and reminded me of why places like Wendy’s and McDonalds exist. I know, I know, quell horror at eating fast food! BUT really, has anyone ever made french fries as good as McDonalds’ at their house? The answer is no and with good reason because the process requires an inordinate amount of steps and thus should only be handled by professionals.

I decided to attempt this on my own, however, because I’m foolish and desirous of making my life difficult. So I went to town on some innocent potatoes, hacked them into fry-sized pieces with a large knife, did not slice any part of my anatomy in the process and proceeded to almost set my apartment complex on fire. Let me explain.

The recipe called for oil to be heated on a cooking sheet in the oven before the fry wedges were placed on it. I did this. However, I did not contemplate the oil dripping off onto the heated coils of the stove which happened promptly causing flames to randomly shoot up and scare me to death. I had visions of everything exploding and my entire unit dying in a fiery furnace (what a horrible way to go) or worse, surviving the flames and being a burn victim for the rest of my life unable to eat properly or go out in the sun. It was a scary five minutes.

However, I managed to turn off the stove, clean up the oil, partially anyway, and resumed making the fries shortly thereafter. I credit the Lord for giving me the courage to complete these tasks and also my own errant stupidity which did not even think about trivial things like “safety” or “apron” or “Whataburger is across the street and has french fries.”

In the end the fries were good, rather edible, and quite tasty when sprinkled with loads of salt (as is the case with most foods…I am a salt fiend). But never again. Never again will I try to do something that only costs around $2 when purchased from a restaurant. I do not care about cholesterol or sodium or any of the other food-trigger warnings. It’s much better to die of a heart attack than being burned alive.

So that consisted of my Thursday. Today is Friday and I can already hear the lazy calls of the weekend. Is it 5 yet?